How it all went down (Part 3)

January 22nd-23rd 2010
After a week of trying to just go back to normal and not worry about bleeding, I was starting to feel more confident. Work had gone well that week and I was feeling good.

However, Friday January 22nd, 10 weeks + 5 days, I woke up after a night shift at around 12:30 in the afternoon. Hadn't slept much, but I was hungry. After a quick snack, I thought I might try to go back to bed when I felt it again...a gush...looked down and sure enough I was bleeding again...and this time it was A LOT. I grabbed the phone and called Brian who was at work and then I lay down with my bottom half on the tile floor in the bathroom and my top half on the carpet of my bedroom. I tried to remain as still as possible, because every time I moved I would gush more blood. It was awful...I didn't know whether to call 911. I was scared and alone. Thankfully Brian made it home in record time.

It took over an hour for the bleeding to slow, but this time, Brian and I were prepared. We had rented a doppler in order to monitor the baby's heartbeat and when Brian used it we could still hear that wonderful whoosh-whoosh-whoosh of Aidan's heart. We knew however that we needed an ultrasound, so the next morning we headed to our local hospital (for the 3rd time) in order to check on our baby.

It once again took ALL day, but we were finally told that the SCH had gotten bigger...A LOT bigger. They didn't give me all the dimensions this time, but they did say that while the baby looked fine, the length of the SCH was OVER 7CM!!! That means that it better than TRIPLED in length. Yikes! The ER doc informed us that after consulting with an OB, he recommended 2-3 weeks of bed rest. And so the bed rest (couch rest) event began.

Oh and with all this, I missed my sister-in-laws birthday. Sorry Lisa.

February 2nd 2010
Made it to 12 weeks + 3 days. I'm still pregnant and today is the day for my NT scan. We've already seen peanut Aidan a few times at this point (this will in fact be my 4th ultrasound), however this is traditionally the time when most pregnant women first see their babies and we are excited. Still scared of course, but I've spent the last week and a half lying or sitting around my house in hopes that the clot has decided to shrink and not cause my peanut any more problems.

So after downing the requisite 6000 gallons of water (whatever, it felt like it), I'm lying on the ultrasound table with my bladder about to burst and having that lovely ultrasound goo squirted on me. The tech is (as usual) a taciturn middle aged lady with zero personality. Do they teach them that in ultrasound tech school, how to be as unfriendly as possible? She gets the pictures she needs and then I (THANKFULLY) am allowed to pee, before Brian gets to come in for a look see. Given what happens over the next few weeks I will be forever grateful to Brian for being at all my appointments. I think it helped him to be more connected to Aidan.

Sadly all is not right already. Although Aidan is measuring perfect at this point (nuchal thickness 1.1 mm, who's mommy's good boy??!!), we later learn that my IPS blood work is not. I won't go into detail about it now, but basically IPS blood work can indicate not just problems with the baby, but problems with the placenta. In fact, when the baby is measuring perfect and has no other markers for genetic or congenital defects (like our little man), the likely cause of wonky blood work is a malfunctioning placenta. We don't know this yet of course...so we are just happy at this point that our baby looks good.

February 3rd 2010
It's Thursday and right after Brian gets home from work around 5pm I know something isn't right. My belly is uncomfortable, hard feeling...it feels just the way it does when I'm about to start bleeding...

And once again, I'm on my back with my lower half in my bathroom and my upper half on our carpeted downstairs hallway with blood gushing out of me. It's once again, awful. We have our doppler, however, and from this we know that Aidan is still with us. The bleeding is heavy, perhaps even more so that last time. We spend most of the evening with me lying on the floor, with towels under me, hoping the bleeding will slow. It does eventually and I fall asleep in our TV room, on the air mattress Brian has set up to avoid any bleeding in our bed. My belly still hurts. Fortunately tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment.

February 4th 2010
After waiting an hour or more in her waiting room, my doctor sees us. Although she is nice and listens, she really can't do any more for me. With my heart defect and my so far complex pregnancy, I think she is relieved when I tell her we have a high risk OB appointment scheduled at the Special Pregnancy Program next week. She does however tell us she already got the ultrasound results from the NT scan on Wednesday. That radiologist reported that while there is one 'normal' fetus, there is also a 'large empty sac, probably a blighted ovum that is about the size of the sac the normal fetus is in which will likely resolve itself'. We are kind of stumped...no other ultrasound we had prior to our NT scan reported a blighted ovum...and why didn't this radiologist comment on the humungous SCH I have sitting in my uterus threatening my baby? I think my doctor is a bit stumped too...but she can only tell us what's on the report. We wonder if maybe our baby was supposed to be a twin. I always wanted twins (actually I wanted to BE a twin when I was a kid), but it's probably better for my heart that I'm only pregnant with one.

I also ask her about 'bed rest'. Since I'm still bleeding from the 'big bleed' I had yesterday, she says I'll probably be on bed rest awhile longer. This is supposed to be lying, on my back or on either side. I can wiggle my toes, pump and roll my ankles...but really I'm supposed to be a still as possible. I go home and lay down and continue to hope peanut is going to be okay.

Next post...to the Special Pregnancy Program...where we learn just how 'special' we are, and how the more 'special' you are, the less that can be done to save your baby.