Just had a question for those of you who are willing to share. One of the big comforts I had after Aidan died was that we kept his ashes. Initially I thought we would eventually bury them, but I have since changed my mind and hope to keep them with us until either Brian or I die, when our ashes will be buried with Aidan's. Sort of 'whoever dies first wins an eternal resting place with our son!'
But is it even possible to have a funeral home collect the body of a 'miscarriage' (assuming I deliver prior to 20 weeks)? Did those of you out there who delivered 'a miscarriage' have your baby cremated? Were you able to get the cremains back? Did you take photos? I know NILMDTS doesn't do photos before 20 weeks gestation so I'm wondering if we should prepare by ensuring our own camera is ready if in fact I go into labour within the next short while. The few things that I have of Aidan's are so precious to me, and I'm trying to figure out how to preserve anything of Acorn's, given that he may be 'younger', less developed and therefore less 'deserving' of memory preservation in the eyes of medical personnel who eventually deal with us.
I feel somehow like it would be a disservice to Acorn not to do the things for him that I did for his brother. For Aidan we got a pretty wooden urn and a silver necklace with his ashes. It wasn't cheap, but since we didn't have a service or a burial I felt those were the things we did to remember and honour his short life. I cannot imagine not doing it for Acorn if (when?) he dies. I'm trying to be a fair mommy to both my children, even though neither of them really cares.
Any help from moms who have had a 'late miscarriage'? Thanks in advance.