tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post400336225559237747..comments2023-09-18T08:07:15.353-04:00Comments on Aidan, Baby of Mine: You Like Me, You Really Like Me!Emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17587287197734518952noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-37678715301269656902011-07-09T09:13:06.564-04:002011-07-09T09:13:06.564-04:00That was such an amazing post. Thank you for shari...That was such an amazing post. Thank you for sharing your heart. I have those people in my 'mental outbox' now too. And while it's sad, it's what I have to do to survive. And in the end when I think about how much richer my life will be in many ways because of experiences such immense loss I think they are the ones that are missing out on life's experience. I am so glad you and I have this space and people that can get it. <br /><br />I am praying for you today as it sounds Acorn is making their arrival today. Hugs to you.Melissahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16483071078235764202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-3268359951554197572011-07-08T17:15:42.857-04:002011-07-08T17:15:42.857-04:00I read the post you created the link for. I though...I read the post you created the link for. I thought it was such a great post in response to how you felt about the girl's comment on babyloss blogs. It brought me to tears when you described your shift to your friends about the dead baby and having to put him in a body bag and bring him to the morgue. I can't imagine what it must have been like to do that as part of your job and to see the families sadness and then you had to experience it first hand when you lost Aidan.<br />Thinking of you, Aidan, and Acorn always...Beckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11917822168137274298noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-36152257514701750492011-07-08T11:34:26.378-04:002011-07-08T11:34:26.378-04:00Emily -
I have always been a little weird about ...Emily - <br /><br />I have always been a little weird about death, I am always intrigued by other peoples reactions to it. Of course when my baby died, I got the old tried and true, perhaps Danielle it was for the best. Oh really? So it is for the best that I spent the last 6 years of life thinking about what I lost? Really? And yes of course I am grateful for the baby I successfully carried to term, but what about the one that didn't make it? Should I forget about him or her? I don't know whether I had a boy or girl, I lost the baby at 16 weeks but the baby wasn't developed properly. <br /><br />I really hate to say this....I mean I really do, because I do not wish baby loss on anyone. But it is nice to know that someone else "gets it" I am not alone out there floating around. Wondering if I am normal. <br /><br />Big hugs to you and Brian!!<br />DanielleDanielle Hammerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05288807793064942155noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-20302371527054119592011-07-08T08:11:24.265-04:002011-07-08T08:11:24.265-04:00Hi Emily,
How could I not follow you? Your loss wa...Hi Emily,<br />How could I not follow you? Your loss was terrible and I have so much hope for you now. I had a loss, too. And now I have a baby. I just hope your story has the same happy ending mine did.<br />xoxoMadalena Soareshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16033182517349937484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-39145376345979069312011-07-08T03:58:39.166-04:002011-07-08T03:58:39.166-04:00A friend of mine said to me one day that she'd...A friend of mine said to me one day that she'd rather not visit Sky's grave, because it's a 'sad and depressing' place. I wanted to jump in her face and scream: No really? Do you have any idea how depressing it was to bury my son there? If you find it hard, think twice about how tough it must be for me.<br /><br />Can't blame her though. Sometimes the dead baby fear must be overwhelming for other people... and they are to be envied for not seeing the dark side of parenting.<br /><br />Thanks for writing here... all the best to you and Acorn!<br />xoAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-42218078587612909432011-07-08T02:19:09.974-04:002011-07-08T02:19:09.974-04:00So I hesitated to comment on the last post, but I ...So I hesitated to comment on the last post, but I will now, because I want you to know a specific way you are helping others by writing this blog.<br /><br />I come from a similar situation, I am a PICU nurse and have been present at the passing of many children, some babies, some school-aged, some adolescent. After a child dies, whether they have spent months on our unit or hours, I always wonder what the family goes through afterward. I feel like as nurses, we are cut off from the grief process. We say goodbye to our patients and then the are gone and we are supposed to pick up and move on, admit somebody new and pretend like it hasn't affected us.<br /><br />I found the babyloss community through another mom's blog. We were pregnant and due around the same time, and when she lost her daughter I was devastated (even though I didn't know her at all) and terrified that the same thing could happen to me. It didn't, I have a young daughter who is healthy (now) but my job has taught me that there are no guarantees. Life is so variable!<br /><br />I guess the meaning of this comment is that I just wanted you to know you are helping so many people with your words, and your story. Even people who have never lost a child. At least not one of their own.Amandahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12877813074744180941noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-8711862938908184842011-07-08T00:42:27.870-04:002011-07-08T00:42:27.870-04:00I read back over what I wrote and realized I refer...I read back over what I wrote and realized I referred to my miscarriage as my baby dying. I didn't mean to imply that my loss was the same as yours or anyone else reading this. I am very aware that a first trimester loss is not at all the same as losing a child youve given birth to. Those were just the words that went through my head at the time when my Mom made that comment. I hope I didn't make you or any if your readers cringe. My sincere apologies if I did.Melhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05857870246600631225noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-69900632682774508902011-07-07T23:18:09.401-04:002011-07-07T23:18:09.401-04:00This is a fantastic post.
My mom is one of those...This is a fantastic post. <br /><br />My mom is one of those eternally positive people. I will go through a long story/rant/explanation of whatever shitty thing is happening to me. Then she will come out with something like, "it will all work out, anyway..." and changes the subject. Or, every time she sees me she makes a comment about how great I'm doing with my recovery from the accident. She never, ever wants to acknowledge the permanence of it, and how that has forever changed my life. It's so damn dismissive of my feelings. Then I can't continue the discussion without feeling like I'm just being negative or petty. <br /><br />Sometimes she tells me a story about someone else's sad turn of events and says, "doesn't that make you realize how lucky we are that nothing has gone wrong in our lives for awhile?" She said those exact words to me after I lost my first pregnancy at 11 weeks. Maybe a month or two after. No, I don't feel good. My goddamn baby died, did you forget that? Ugh. She made a similar comment after my dad (her ex husband) died, just 5 weeks before my wedding. <br /><br />Because she's my mom and has an extra level of influence over me, it sometimes makes me feel like I'm making too much of things. Then I talk to the people close to me that are normal. Lol.<br /><br />Sorry to unload that in your comments! I'm glad your mom is the one fielding those comments for you and not the one saying them. <br /><br />It's Thursday. Did you have a scan today? I was also curious if they have given you Acorn's estimated weight lately? <br /><br />I will restrain myself from ending this with a positive comment. ;)Melhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05857870246600631225noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-14155306436529002962011-07-07T22:51:41.291-04:002011-07-07T22:51:41.291-04:00It's funny because when I started reading here...It's funny because when I started reading here it was in the beginning of Acorn's pregnancy.. just before the storm hit. I remember 'looking' at you and wondering how you were going to fare if you lost another child. In the beginning of my own journey towards 'pregnancy after' I looked to you for light and a 'positive' outcome. When you ruptured I remember wondering how this whole story would end.. and now as the months have passed I realize more now than ever that the story never truly ends. Do I have a whole lot more hope for a positive outcome for you and Acorn? Of course. Do I realize that something could go wrong tomorrow, or next week, or next year or in the years to follow? Absolutely. We as bereaved mothers have a very altered timeline, and therefore an altered view of life in general. There is never really going to be 'end'. There is life before and life after, but every day we spend without our children is quite simply life in between. <br /><br />Thank you for continuing to share this part of your journey.. and that of your children as well.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-6588309293215605472011-07-07T22:32:35.952-04:002011-07-07T22:32:35.952-04:00I am one of those who has not suffered a loss, hav...I am one of those who has not suffered a loss, have 3 healthy kids and I consider myself very, very lucky. Like you said, life is tricky and I'm just the kind of person who is very aware that it can all turn on a dime and so I truly try to appreciate every little moment. I'm drawn to people who call it like they see it and don't hold back and I find that is what keeps me coming back to check up on you and Acorn. You don't sugar coat and in your writings I feel your realness and it's harsh and raw and at the same time beautiful because you describe the fragility of life. Thanks for being real and allowing me to really get to know you. All the best to you, your hubby, Acorn and Aidan.elenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07090092229848322627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-59242790341971729562011-07-07T20:28:39.642-04:002011-07-07T20:28:39.642-04:00So much to say, this was such a great post. I too ...So much to say, this was such a great post. I too felt I would let my readers down if I lost Angus. It was a hard load to carry. <br />Just want to say again, great post, and sending you love.<br />xoHope's Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04984543289642681339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-49680001649610924492011-07-07T17:44:54.386-04:002011-07-07T17:44:54.386-04:00Emily, I have been following your blog for some ti...Emily, I have been following your blog for some time now...thank you so much for sharing Aidan and Acorn with the world and letting so many of us follow your journey. I don't leave comments often, but I check in daily to root you and Acorn on, desperately hoping and wanting him or her to be delivered into this world safe and sound. Last August I lost my son Aaron at 3 days old after open heart surgery. I completely understand your loss and grief, and can only imagine what you are going through with Acorn. As you've stepped into the world of pregnancy after loss, the strength and courage you show amaze and encourage me. Thank you for sharing your life...continuing to read and cheer you on daily.Daniellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05609414926334179001noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-74303844740544888342011-07-07T17:43:56.469-04:002011-07-07T17:43:56.469-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Daniellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05609414926334179001noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-72787489081188005552011-07-07T17:07:44.487-04:002011-07-07T17:07:44.487-04:00Emily, I have been following your blog for about 3...Emily, I have been following your blog for about 3 months now (found it through Laura Jane's blog). I have been hesitant to comment because things have been going so good and I am a bit of a superstitious person. I had a full term loss in Dec.(cord accident, so I understand your fear of cord compression) and also found some peace and healing in my blog...dead baby and all. I am also 9 weeks pregnant with my rainbow and just found out I have a pretty significant SCH and am scared to death I may lose this baby as well. Positivity is so hard when you learn the brutal truth of what pregnancy can or cannot bring. It has been very uplifting to see youf progress through this struggle and can't wait for the picture of your sweet Acorn 14 short (long) days from now. Stay strong Momma, you have come so far!!!!Darceyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11815399702690690011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-6475264361940301282011-07-07T16:33:38.185-04:002011-07-07T16:33:38.185-04:00I was drawn to your blog by the name. I have one ...I was drawn to your blog by the name. I have one son named Aiden. I then learned your story and wish so hard there was something I could do for you (but, I live pretty far away from you!). I am constatantly looking for updates from you and waiting for good news. Do know, if good news does not come we will not (speaking for us readers) will not turn our back on you. This blog family is here to celebrate or try and catch you when you fall. Thank you for being so open and allowing me into your life.kmbhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12607715153718190281noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-90498499549376689802011-07-07T16:23:08.722-04:002011-07-07T16:23:08.722-04:00Thank you for letting me be here, and to share in ...Thank you for letting me be here, and to share in your family's journey. Your strength is so inspiring to me, and Aidan and Acorn are lucky to call you their Mommy. I hope they always know how much you fought for them, no matter how hard it got. Without a doubt, you are doing them proud.Jennhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08736177395472652968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-31078404029228914612011-07-07T15:53:42.936-04:002011-07-07T15:53:42.936-04:00This post, this is why I check in several times a ...This post, this is why I check in several times a day. Because I am a young woman, about to be married and hoping to start my own journey of motherhood in the next few months...and well aware that being a mother means needing tremendous courage and inner strength. I read you, not just because I am hoping desperately for Acorn to be brought into this world safe and sound, but because you have a way of expressing yourself so eloquently and are I hope to learn from your courage.morganehhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13143293222060989133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-176061010619490822.post-80251627906528698052011-07-07T14:42:03.242-04:002011-07-07T14:42:03.242-04:00both aidan and acorn are very real to me, and most...both aidan and acorn are very real to me, and most definitely matter. hugs to you.Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13450929181331922606noreply@blogger.com